Pumped about my new work bag!

tic tac tote: verabradley.com

This is such a trivial post... I don't even care. After looking around for the past two months, I finally purchase my work bag. I've been looking incessantly online and in a ton of stores... Not really sure what I was looking for, other than I knew I wanted it to be something large enough to hold a binder and some other items.

Well, I finally decided on this beauty from Vera Bradley. I am not a person that likes spending a lot of money on something, so it was quite the ordeal that I allowed myself to buy this. ;)

But, I think I'm in love.... And I'm about to pack it full of all my things right now. It has a thousand pockets on the inside and it zips shut which is a nice plus. A couple of the other totes I was considering just had a button closure, and the one was actually almost impossible to do in a timely manner when I tried it out at the store.

Anyway, now I'm sad that my binder doesn't match, but what's a girl to do? These are the things that keep me sane while work is keeping me insane.

Trying to find balance...

So, the thing I'm struggling the most with is finding balance between my professional and personal life. It's like, I know that I need (and want!) to separate work from home, but it's so hard. I'm slow with things and not really efficient yet, so sometimes* I have to stay late to finish my paperwork. (*Sometimes is usually ~3 times a week.) And then, I have questions when I have someone with a condition I've never treated before (insert the eval I just did on a lady who I believe has un-diagnosed trochanteric bursitis) which requires me to spend a little bit of time researching on the internet. Then, I am taking over the cardiac program and feel obligated to give my patients the best care I can, which includes looking up education materials. Add all that together and most days I am doing a lot of work related things outside of work.

And, on top of my fatigue issues, all this is making it very hard to make it to the gym on a regular basis. For example, tonight I just came home and by the time I cooked dinner, I was completely wiped out. So, I realize I need more separation than work being work and personal life being sleep... But, I just don't know what to do to make it different. It's very frustrating. I had found an article to read on the APTA about this very topic, but it had nothing good to say... Basically, just that you need to balance things. Well, I know that... I just don't know how when I am at work late, need to look up something about a patient for the next day, and have unrelenting fatigue. (I finally just did some hormone testing, so we will see what the results show and then what my options are for that...)

I've just gotten into bad habits (mainly not going to the gym regularly) since moving away from home and starting school. It's been a hard transition and there's been a lot going on in my personal life. Besides all the stress of school, my mom was very, very ill through 2/3 of it and there's always something going on with our house whether it be renovations, laundry, etc. I just don't have the energy to deal with it all and so I'm ending up suffering. Which, in turn, is making me feel slightly miserable and sort of like crying a lot.

I just keep telling myself that things are going to improve over time. And that it's not always going to feel like this... Or at least, I hope it doesn't or I may drive myself insane. In fact, as I'm writing this, I am incessently yawning and heavily debating on going to bed. I'm just so tired. But, it will get better! It has to!